Try Something new..it might surprise you!

Hello!
I wanted to share my thoughts on romantic relationships by explaining how to try new things with your partner in order to surprise yourself!
It might surprise you when you try something new what you will find out about the other person. If you keep the same routine, you will never learn new things that you might end up loving or hating about your partner. Red flags will come-up or a renewed sense of love and lust will help retain a sense of flirtation that might have been in hiding for a while.
For example, today my partner and I took a drive down a road that we didnt know where it would lead. Literally, he drove down a street we have always been curious about near the bay bridge and I loved the view! He was happy that we took this road because it lead up to a beautiful park near a marina that we are excited to go back and take picture of the city-skyline of san francisco. I discovered that this would be a great spot to try a surprise picnic-date and he would be thrilled! If we had not driven down this road, I would have never discovered the next new place to try a date. This will really mix things up!
Also, I am going to try cooking more to surprise my partner with my creative side. I want to show him how much I care and I want to make him personalized dishes that he will love. I found out that guys have a strange sense of taste, or at least my partner does, for savory dished with lots of cheese! So, Im making him fried-breaded chicken which will be pan-fried then finished in the oven and served with tomato sauce then I will make home-made potato gratin. This will really make it special and I will try to make this myself for a surprise!
I hope you guys do something new to discover fun things about your partner!
xoxo

Kids Say the Darnest Things

http://www.stumbleupon.com/su/5Ot3Ah/jmm.aaa.net.au/articles/20899.htm

Once again, problems with the link. But copy and paste, it's one of those things you find on stumble that you can't help but smile at!

Songs for the Heart

I love listening to songs that speak of love and romance. There is no better way to inspire that lovin' feeling than a good love song. When you are in a relationship, it is easy to relate to what the singers are describing in their music and, of course "it makes you feel all warm and fuzzy inside." It is also fun to listen to these songs in the presence of your boyfriend or girlfriend just to share a special moment with one another. Below, are links to music videos of various popular love songs. I should mention that if you just got out of a relationship or are wanting to strangle all those couples out there, you may not want to click these links just yet. Not to worry, you will most likely be dancing around to these songs while thinking about your new love in no time. And guys, don't act like you don't like these songs too--we all know it's an act. And the nominees are...(drum roll please...)

1.) The Only Exception by Paramore

2.)I Don't Want to Miss a Thing by Aerosmith

3.) Back at One by Brian McKnight

4.) She is Love by Parachute

5.) Love Me Tender by Elvis (obviously this is a little older than the rest but it is SUCH a great song).

I hope you enjoy. Here is a list to many other love songs!

Why the hell is she with him?

It makes me sad when I see people in unsatisfying relationships. There are a lot of people I know whom remain in a relationship even though they know they aren't getting what they want out of it. One girl I know has a boyfriend who treats with her disrespect, barely ever shows her affection to her if around other people, and basically displays that he cares little for their relationship. Of course, I don't know what goes on when they are alone together but I can't imagine that it is very different from what happens in public. When Valentine's day rolled around, he didn't even do so much as get her a card. Dude really? Not to mention, he had been talking to another girl through the first half of their relationship and leaving posts on his im feed saying he loved her. When I look at her I see a very pretty, smart, and driven girl and it just makes me think "why are you with him?" Why are a lot of guys and girls with people that don't give them the respect or love they deserve and who invest such little time in their relationships? Is it desperation? Is it a lack of self-esteem? It has always been a hard puzzle for me to put together. 

This website by M. Freeman lists six reasons for why people stay in unhappy relationships. I'm not going to list them again because that will just be repetitive when the link is literally right there--so click on it! One of them that really struck me though is number 4: "people expect us to stay together". I can't imagine being with someone just because my friends expected this of me. Who are you in a relationship for anyways? Your friends or yourself? If your friends were truly your friends, wouldn't they want what was best for you and be able to recognize that you are in an unhappy and unhealthy relationship? One of my best friends was in a very bad relationship and, as mean as it sounds, I was so glad when it ended. This isn't because I don't like to see my friend happy or in love. It's because she WASN'T happy or in love and her relationship was dragging her down and turning her into something I couldn't recognize. It was if the boy had some spell over her. He could literally get away with anything and she would still stay with him and, on top of that, make all sorts of ridiculous excuses for his actions. It was a very painful thing to watch since I cared about her so much and only wanted her to have the very best. 

Unfortunately, it is very difficult to convince a person to get out of a relationship that they are very invested in. People are going to do what they want, even if their best friend is literally yelling in their ear to stop being ridiculous and think about how unbalanced their relationship is. If you are in this position, these are some things I would recommend:

-tell your friend how amazing/beautiful/smart (or whatever category) they are. Make sure to list categories that don't include the presence of their significant other and only apply to them personally.

-ask your friend about their relationship and when they bring up situations that are iffy, ask questions like "wow, do you like being treated like that?" or "don't you think you deserve more?" This may help them rethink their relationship.

-invite them to hang out and when you guys are having a good time say things like "wow, this is really fun I miss hanging out with you like old times." This could help your friend realize how much he or she has been missing since being with their boyfriend/girlfriend. 

There are tons of other suggestions I could list, but I think these are a good start. If you are going to be there for your friend, you are going to have to be patient and realize that there is always the potential that your friend will still remain in their relationship. There really is nothing you can do about this. You can either learn to accept it or, if it bothers you too much, you can tell your friend that you can't be friends with them if they are in the relationship. Of course, this is a very difficult situation to be in but it is up to you to decide. We can pick our friends but we can't pick the people they date...unfortunately that's life. I know, I hate the saying too. 

Staycation tips for a steamy weekend!

Hello Lovers! Soo...you want to have a romantic weekend but the budget is low? In order to go on vacation, tickets, hotel reservations and car rentals are necessary but whats wrong with what you have at home or around your area? My advice is to dedicate one saturday and make it a stay-at- home- vacation...STAYCATION! There are lots of ways to pamper yourself by starting with brunch, then visiting a museum or going to the beach but THEN get a couples massage and go to a nice dinner. While it seems like it will cost alot, consider how much you saved and really indulge in this ONE day of luxury in your own neighborhood rather than going on a plane to an exotic place. Make the day themed like Safari and try something new and different that you wouldn't try on a normal night. Stay at home and save money by also making chocolate covered strawberries and get a fun romantic movie like The Princess Bride or Roman Holiday. Just drop the work and emails for one day and have a stay at home vacation while taking pictures and remembering it as one of the best "vacations" that you two took :) Have fun!

Shakespeare got it right. But John Donne makes him look like a Hallmark Card.

http://awonderfulblog.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/08/romeojuliet.jpg


This could possibly sound nerdy, and I know how we all love to avoid that label now, but all through middle school and high school I loved reading Shakespeare. There are times when the Bard's writing is not as riveting as some today, but his classics endure for a reason. There are many times when I wish I could be bilingual or had experienced a different language as my first language, but everything I read Shakespeare I am reminded what a gift it is to read it in the original English.

He captured to many raw human emotions so perfectly his stories are among the three most reference sources (in modern writing, there are three sources used for allusions more than any others: the bible, Greek and Roman mythology, and Shakespeare). Hmm. To be as commonly referenced as the Bible, he must have done something right.

So what does he have to say about love? I can only hope that you AT LEAST know of Romeo and Juliet, and I hazard to say that if you have not read it your education is not complete. You could be an engineer or a construction worker. You must read the works of Shakespeare. His entrapment with love and love at first site, however, is not just expressed in one of his best known works. William Shakespeare's explorations into the human emotion range from A Midnight Summer's Dream to Hamlet. I would highly recommend reading nearly all of them.

There is then the man, the poet, that author Margaret Edson in her play "Wit" (again, a must read. One might be thinking at this point that I am an English major, and while I do miss analyzing the classics and other works, as a Political Science Major with an interest in the Middle East, I am more than satisfied as of the past two months in my chosen area of study,)describes as making Shakespeare look like a Hallmark card. This would be John Donne. Although he wrote many types of poetry, he is well known for his love poems. Once read through of The Good-Morrow will emphasize this. (http://www.luminarium.org/sevenlit/donne/goodmorrow.htm I Sadly could not get the link button to work.) I understood what Shakespeare meant when he spoke of love at first site as I read these words in my high school years.

These classics have so much to teach us. In a world of modern media where love as objectification seems to be the main theme, one cannot forget the works of Shakespeare and John Donne.

Revvv it up!

My topic of thought for you all this week connects one's physical well-being and libido. The connection between the two are undeniable in recent studies that show the positive affects of exercise in your sex life. NOW lets get it straight here...im not trying to sell you anything like those spam emails that PROMISE better performance or anything like that Im just informing you all on what can truly cultivate a long lasting relationship. I know it may be taboo to talk about by recent news has the 411 on the truth about staying in shape and shaping up in bed. A Fox report from Kyle Nuse states,

"Any regular cardiovascular exercise and deep stretching that increases blood flow specifically to the buttocks, pelvis and groins area -- such as yoga, power walking, jogging or cycling--is going to increase circulation to the genitals, and as a result, rekindle sexual arousal and orgasmic function." Read ME!

While for some, its about gaining muscle and strength I see the energy and endorphin affects to be a great boost, as well. Exercise decreases stress and it keeps you relaxed and happy. Translate this to the bedroom and you have a winning combination! It is very interesting to think about and it actually makes sense that you will feel more limber and confident with regular exercise and the Fox report doesnt ask us to do much more than jogging or biking. Finding the time to hit the gym for 2-3 days at 30 mins a day will make a huge difference in our cardio and boost libido....maybe all the time college students spend in the gym is increasing libidos all around campus! I see the correlation between endurance, strength, and flexibility especially from YOGA (youtube of some moves for you to try at the bottom :) will help keep things moving, as well. 

Hitting the gym can be more than beneficial for your looks and it's socially fun, as well, but it has soo many benefits for your romantic life when it come to keeping things lively and limber. You will find more focus if you try yoga and train your muscles to be strong and flexible. I would suggest experimenting with different weight training and getting a personal trainer for ONE or TWO sessions (to cut back on the cost) and then using the moves you learn in those one or two sessions to keep a good workout routine going. Remember: its about endurance, strength, flexibility and stress-release in the gym for endorphins to make everything HAPPY :)


Try Some YOGA!

Promise, it doesn't always have to be awkward.

Everyone knows that certain situations are notoriously awkward. Or seeing a guy or girl after said situations, or that girl or guy you had a crush on can be just as awkward. But it doesn't always have to be that way. The trick is not to let any previous encounter go to your head too much. What happened, happened. If you are happy (but possible nervous) to see the person, then act happy to see them. Most people will hard to find fault with that. If it's someone you don't want to see, truly, ever again, and avoiding them seems to be out of the question, you don't have to walk past with your head pointed the other direction or so focused on your phone that you'll miss the wall right in front of you. Just glance and wave or say a quick "hi" while you continue walking. No added pain necessary.

Movies to spice up the romance.

There are a TON of romantic movies that have been created and there are only more on the way. I personally love romantic movies, especially if they include humor. Sure, some of these movies are corny or predictable or simple of "girly" but I think they are fun to watch, especially with your significant other. Personally, I would rather much be cuddling with my boyfriend watching a romantic movie than something like The Terminator or Batman. There is always a time and place for this  but if we are talking about movies that can easily put you in that lovey-dovey (we all know it) mood, than I'd say romantic movies do the trick. Of course, there are a ton to chose from and some are better than others. Here are some of my personal favorites. I may come off as a typical girl who has bad movie taste but, hey, think what you will.

"A Walk to Remember" is an incredibly sweet story of a couple in high school, Jamie and Landon, who fall in love. The passion between them is incredibly strong and the couple goes through a lot, especially once Jamie reveals something very serious about her life. One of my favorite parts about the movie is that there is also a song included (I mean duh it's Mandy Moore) that just also happens to be incredibly catchy. Just think--maybe after the movie you could see the song to your boyfriend or girlfriend? Ok, that may be a bit of a stretch but what I'm getting at is it is a great movie that shows compassion for other people. It's also a tear jerker so make sure to have some kleenex--or you boyfriend/girlfriend's sleeve--at hand.

"When Harry Met Sally" is another great romance movie. It is also extremely funny. My boyfriend actually introduced me to this movie and we had a great time watching it together and talking about how we could relate to some parts of the film.  It tells the story of Harry Burns and Sally Albright who have a very long and rock friendship for many years. Between fighting and falling in love (in very abnormal ways), the movie is guaranteed to be entertaining. One of the most memorable parts is when Meg Ryan, who plays Sally, fakes an orgasm at a diner. Both of the actors do an incredible job and the characters they portray help show that love is neither perfect or simple. "When Harry Met Sally" is both relatable and hysterical. Not to mention, it helps to prove that no matter what decade (this movie takes place in the late 80's) there will always be some sort of similarities that men and women share when it comes to being in a serious relationship with another person. 

The final movie I am going to recommend, though I could probably talk about several more, is "The Holiday." This movie doesn't just follow one, but two couples who surprisingly find love in unexpected places. The main characters, Amanda Woods (Cameron Diaz) and Iris Simpkins (Kate Winslet) decide to switch houses for the holiday to get away from their own lives. Amanda finds love in London and Iris, in California. The complexity of the plot is very interesting to follow and there are many fun surprises from beginning to end. Of course, there is love. Why else would I be recommending this? Perfect for snuggling up with your loved one on a rainy day--or any time if you want. 

So, I hope you consider checking out these movies. I should mention that they are great films whether or not you watch them with your boyfriend or girlfriend or not. Girls, if your boyfriend won't agree to watch them with you, tell him you will watch one of his more manly movies the next time. He may pretend to not like these "chick flicks' but there is no way he won't get at least something out of it. And besides, as long as he knows that it's a time for him and you to be together alone, I doubt there will be a problem. Enjoy!

(After) He Cheats

Cheating sucks. I know anyone who reads that and has been cheated on will think, hmmm, understatement of the year. Cheating creates one of those situations in which even two rational people, who would normally break up and be cordial after, would forever hate each other's guts instead. I'm not saying that's what always happens, that is one potential issue. The thing about cheating- actually, it's more like things about cheating- is that it creates a very different environment from another, normal, fight or breakup scene.

The people who stay together truly impress me. Those couples that don't break up. I'm not the type of person to classify people into two groups, but (ha) there are two sorts of groups here. Generally. OK, more like three now that I think about it. There are the couples that one cheats, and they come to reach a deep level of understanding and they move on with a deep and real relationship. I don't know where these couples exist, I'm just sure that they do. Then you have the couples where one person is naive and obvious to that the fact that their partner is constantly cheating on them, but the other person more or less knows it in real life. They choose, for multiple reasons, not to leave them. One day they will get a slap in the face that they deserve better (haven't you ever wanted to be that person??) and leave the cheating jerk, but not yet. And then there are the couples that seem to fight, a lot, cheat on each other, a lot, and still stay together and eventually get married because, let's face it, they are made for each other. I feel like these are actually three very specific examples, and by no means do couples who stay together fit one of the three, but work with me here.

Then there are the majority, me 'n my scientific survey says so, of people who break up after cheating. Naturally. Nothing says I don't want to be in a relationship anymore like cheating does. Cheating breaks all the trust in a relationship- not just about other people and what goes on when you aren't around, but anything else that was every promised to you. Gone. You can't trust their judgement anymore, or believe they will make mature decisions, so all other trust in the other person in general kinda goes right out the window. The important thing is not to assign this lack of trust to everybody else. Even if it happens more than once. There are decent people out there, and there are lots of people who will get into a relationship and won't cheat. And people don't always make the same mistakes twice. Really. I'm shocked I typed it but it's true.

Sticky Situation.

So, your best friend breaks up with their boyfriend or girlfriend and from what you can tell the relationship is over for good. What happens if you start to have feelings for your best friend's ex significant other? Is there any way this can work? Is it possible to still have a relationship with your best friend if you end up dating his or her ex? These, unfortunately are not questions that can be answered quickly and are filled with exceptions specific to each situation. Luckily, I have never found myself in this situation myself (I'm the type of person who couldn't date a best friend's ex and also the type of person who would flip if my best friend did this to me). Nonetheless, after seeing it be done a few times throughout my time I have some tips based on my observations:

1.) Consider how close your friendship is and how much it means to you. Does a romantic relationship mean more to you even if that friend has always been there for you?

2.) If you are thinking about dating your friend's ex, WAIT AWHILE. There is nothing more back-stabbing then starting to have a fling with your friend's ex just a week after the relationship ended. Honestly, I would suggest waiting years until the relationship is definitely a part of the past. If the chemistry is that strong, there is no reason it shouldn't be there in the future.

3.) Ask your best friend how they feel about the situation. Make sure you actually listen to their response and don't alter it to make it fit how you feel/what you want.

4.) If you do end up becoming serious with your friend's ex, don't flaunt it. This is a mean and very insensitive thing to do.

5.) Do whatever you can to not go there. Think about it. Your best friend will likely always be there for you while most, especially young, relationships are bound to change. Besides, do you really want your bf's sloppy seconds?

When He Cheats

What are you suppose to do when he cheats? Stay? Leave? So many times we see women in the public political eye standing with their man after he is caught cheating. The perfect wife, right? Well, staying with your man after he cheats depends on a number of different factors.

1. Family. If you both have a family together then it may be best to take some time, weight your options. Don’t rush your decision; after all you have your kids to think about. If you are willing to forgive, forget and move on and he is willing to never cheat again then is sounds like your best bet would be to stay together. But if the family household is dysfunctional and you and your man are constantly arguing then maybe you should think about splitting up. Your child(ren)’s health depends on it.

2. Remorse. Is your man sorry for what he has done or does he blame you for the reason why he seeks another woman? Does he make excuses like; I’m only human, I’m a man, etc? You need to decide for yourself if he is truly remorseful and if you think he will do it again.

3. Forgiveness. If you don’t think that you will be able to or willing to forgive your man then you need to let him go. There is no point of staying with hi if you are going to continue to bring up the past mistakes he has made. It only causes more stress and hostility in the relationship.

So think about, and don’t feel ashamed for staying with man who cheats. No one can know or understand your love but you. But make sure you make the best decision for yourself. Don’t follow the advice of others if you truly feel a different way. After all, you live and you learn, this is just another learning experience.

Break Up to Make Up

Do you and your partner seem to just break up to make up? Some people consider this a regular part of a relationship. Others would call that a unhealthy relationship. So, is it love that was just meant to be… that’s why you guys keep coming back to each other or is this relationship in need of a permeate break??

Well, each case is different. First you must identify the reason for the frequent break ups. More often than not the reasons are similar to each other, if not the same. If you do find that the reasons are similar are the same then you must tackle that issue head on. You are your partner need to come to a unified realization of this problem and work to fix it. Once you BOTH except what the problem is you must then open up communication lines and talk to each other with respect and understanding. Figure out why this issue(s) keeps occurring and find out if one another is willing to make the necessary changes to stop this constant breaking up. AND BELIEVE ME THE BEST SOLUTION IS NOT MAKING A PROMISE TO NEVER BREAK UP NO MATTER WHAT… THAT DOESN’T WORK AND IT MAKES YOU MORE UNHAPPY AND RESENTFUL. If an agreement isn’t reached then you should seriously consider taking a permeate break.

Although this may be a difficult task to do, it seems that in this case the bad of the relationship out weights the good. Breaking up constantly causes unwanted stress; stress isn’t good for your health- physical or emotional. Take at least a month off and see how your mood changes. Yes, it will be very difficult for the first couple of weeks but you will notice (hopefully) that you are much more happier and have a drama free life.

Nothing is Certain.

I have been thinking about relationships a lot lately and, recently, an obvious but important concept has been in my mind: nothing in relationships is for certain. This is a very hard concept for me to grasp or want to believe but, in reality, it is true. In relationships and love nothing is for certain and there is never any guarantee that you won't end up being broken-hearted. Just recently, I learned that a couple I know fairly well are splitting up. They have been married for an extremely long time and how two nearly-grown kids. I believe they are the perfect example of "nothing is certain." I'm sure when the couple got married they didn't plan or believe they would get divorced in the future. They probably loved each other entirely and expected to stay together forever. Unfortunately, in relationships, nothing is set in stone. You can never be certain that a person won't leave you for someone else, that a person won't lie to you, or that there is no way your relationship won't fall apart. I absolutely hate this and wish there was some way to control or fix it but really such is life. It may sound a little blunt but it is something everyone at some point must accept. Letting go and taking a risk even if it is scary as hell is a part of being in a serious relationship. As hard as it is, I would frankly rather take that risk than to not have a chance to experience all the joys of being with someone. So yes, nothing is ever certain but, in my opinion, the benefits of being in a happy relationship will always outweigh the cost no matter where you end up in the future. 

"Think before you speak"...easier said than done.

I've been told many times in my life that I need to work on thinking before I speak. It kills me to admit that it is still something that is a very large issue in my life. It is always important to think before you speak no matter who you are taking to...your mom, your brother, your boss, your professor, your friend and of course your significant other. I have found that there have been many instances in my relationship with my boyfriend that I have not been able to bite my tongue before any damage was doene. I say something and, like always, there is NEVER any way to take it back. I believe that this is a bad quality in myself and to anyone else who possesses it. To be in a mature relationship ,(or really to be mature in general), you need to be able to have a filter and know if something is okay to say BEFORE it slips out of your mouth. You can try as hard as you can to take what you said and make it into something else, (the whole "that's not what I meant" trick), but, let's be honest, no one is ever really successful at doing that. Words can be harsh, especially if the person speaking isn't taking the person on the receiving end into consideration. 

Now, I don't want to come across as if I am preaching because it is obviously something I need to seriously and continuously work on. All I'm saying is that I have done it enough times to know that speaking your mind doesn't mean saying everything that you think. There are many words that I wish I could take back but I'll never be able to and this is sad for both me and my boyfriend. Something said by Veera Mahajan  reminded of how it important it is to think before anything  comes out of my mouth. She says "since you care for your loved ones, you correct them, but very often your criticism is passed very bluntly, without reflecting the negative effect it could have." In other words, just because you become frustrated with your boyfriend or girlfriend doesn't mean you have to be mean and spit words full of venom. Criticizing or expressing anger can be done with out hurting the other person so much that it is really beyond repair. 

Believe me, I know this is all easier said than done but it is important to think about frequently if you don't want to risk hurting your loved one during troubling times. One of the hardest things to see is the person you love the most be hurt by something you have said--there is no way of helping them except apologizing profusely. To avoid situations like these, I would suggest trying to remain calm and take a few breaths before speaking to be an important personal commitment. That way, not only are you more in control of yourself but the consequences will be much less painful to both your partner and yourself. As humans, we have strong emotions and sometimes they can be extremely difficult to control. Still, by saying something mean before thinking it through will likely result in even more hurt and pain. Personally, these are things that I don't want to be a part of my relationship. I would assume that most people feel the same way. So, think before you speak especially if you are angry. Having to live with the hurt you have caused because of the stupid words you have said out of anger and spite is never enjoyable, but is luckily something that can be improved with practice and dedication. 

Relationship Woes

What happens when that BIG fight comes along and you are out of ammunition? Do you retreat and tell the other person that you cannot fight at the moment? Does this prolong the fighting? Sometimes, you just dont feel like putting up the good fight. Its like a debate where one person is trying to win and the other is left struggling to find the right words. I, for one, am always on the defensive end trying to find the ammunition that does not always come to me right away. It always take me a long time to think of what I want to get across in my defense. So is stepping away from the fight going to help me think? Sometimes, its not fair if I retreat and say "I just cant fight" because the other person is trying to "get the fight over with." I cant decide which angle is better to take...fight head on or take some time first? I wish I could get some people to weigh-in on my dilemma because there are pros and cons to both scenarios. Fighting fair is not always going to make both parties happy. If I want a break from the fight then maybe it will blow out of proportion later when things are brought to light that you had more time to think about. If you get it over with, then the most pressing issues will be dealt with and the "bigger picture" problems are left out for the time being. But maybe, those "bigger issues" SHOULD be dealt with? I just cant decide which approach is better when it comes to fighting in your defense. You want the big fight to be clean and fair so why not get it over with? Then you can speak without holding back (but will this cause problems without a filter?) or will your true feelings surface? Still, with a little time to think and cool off, the BIG fight may be more tough because you both will have strong arguments but maybe it will be fought without the passion of the drama "in the moment." It is really tough to choose but each couple has to figure out what is their best "way" of fighting...in the moment OR waiting for the right moment to say what is on your mind.

Fighting is NO fun but in my mind, it actually helps development because no relationship is without some bumps to make you bond stronger. However, big "blow out" fights can do more damage than good for both of you emotionally. We have to understand our comfort levels and what is too far in a relationship to cross the line. Abuse will not be tolerated for a healthy romantic relationship and it must be helped by someone standing up to save the relationship and get help to solve the roots of the abuse, how to stop it for the future and see if the relationship can still function if the abuse is gone. Fighting must be done FAIRLY. Look to older couples and the strongest relationships that you know to see how they fight and see if this works for you. With me, I like to thkink about my arguements more and I know personally that if I try to fight in the moment, I am fighting a losing battle because I just CANT think of my defense on the spot. Figure out what works for you and avoid that BIG fight that will lead to saying things that do not need to be said. Play Fair, lovers :)

xo 

Reasons to Trust Your Friends

I once read a quote from a female comedian that read, "Going out with a jerk is like having food stuck in your teeth- all your friends notice before you do." I can't seem to find the author, and although the comment was meant to be a joke, it's completely true. I literally think about every time one of my friend's boyfriends pulls what I think is a jerk move. It's important to trust one another in a relationship, but becoming deaf to what your friends have to say about your guy or girl will become a bad thing. No matter how much you think you love somebody, (and here I'm not talking about your fiancée or husband), your friends will be the ones that are around when the guy (or girl) is gone. Things that you don't want to notice, or just plan don't notice, your friends will pick up on. They've got your back.

Why Traveling is the Best

Read me! In case you can't tell, I might be spending too much time on Stumble Upon. If you don't know what that is, go to stumbleupon.com and set up an account- its free and from what I can tell they don't spam you/give out your information. Anyways, it's a great time waster, esp. if your sick... like me. And on the rare occasion that you are using it for homework (promise! I was looking for links for a required twitter feed for the same class) it can also give you cute ideas for you romantic relationships blog.

Which is that traveling with your significant other is the best option ever. I know lots of people have the vacation horror stories- and bad vacations will happen once in a while. Airports are probably the biggest taker of the blame. But hotels, motels, hostels, etc. can mess up as well as restaurants... or natural disasters or weather... but that does not mean you have to sit in your locked house 24/7. And although the places in the link probably cost lots of money to visit, that doesn't mean there isn't lots of economical options to get away somewhere.

And then there are the reasons trips are great with your significant other, no matter what you choose to do- a day hike on a weekend or a 10 day stay in a country where neither (or both) of you speak the language. It's an adventure- and experiencing experiences together (yes, that is grammatically correct) is more or less a guaranteed way to bond, without any worry about awkward moments or not having things to talk about. If you're actively doing something, discussions about the day or the moment come more naturally, unlike sitting across from each other at the coffee shop 2 blocks down. Experiences are the sorts of things that produce inside jokes, and a tough or amazing experience together can make two people closer than a year of mutual acquaintanceship. So if you have the money, take trips that lead you far away.. or, just go somewhere new.

It's time to think.

There are a couple of people I know that need to take a crash course on "romantic relationship etiquette." It may just be me but I think it is really strange when a person frequently talks about past hookups and crushes to their boyfriend or girlfriend. Sure, these topics do come up and a couple should be aware of their significant other's past love lives. However, I think it is both rude and insensitive to bring up other flings on a regular basis and, especially, to bring them up and talk about them in front of many other people. The other week when I was at home my friend was hanging out with her boyfriend and a couple of our close friends. She saw a boy she had had relations with in the past and started freaking out and calling attention to the situation. It was weird because the guy didn't even see her and no one else would have noticed if she hadn't brought it up. Now, this may just be a personal characteristic she has and she may enjoy creating drama out of nothing, but I still think it is worth bringing up. Personally, I wanted to slap her and ask her why the hell she was doing that in front of her boyfriend (or at all really). I have a feeling if her boyfriend had pointed out a girl he had been with in the past, she would have thrown a fit. Basically what I'm trying to say is have some respect. If you are with another person, you aren't considering their feelings if you are pointing out every Tom, Harry, or Dick you hooked up with on a drunken party night. If the behavior continues, your significant other could begin to have a problem with what you are doing and wonder why those other people matter so much to you. He or she may act like they don't care but they could be thinking something very different. If you are still having difficulty grasping this concept, try considering being in your partner's shoes and having to be reminded of who they used to date. Doesn't feel very good, does it?

Blogging gets Romantic!

Hello!! Seeing as the vast interweb has soo much to offer people needing relationship advice and romantic experiences to relate to, I wanted to share some Blogs similar to this one in order for you to see other realms of romance.
First, "Wink Wink Wink" is a single girl blogger who doesnt hold back her opinions and her OWN romantic encounters in the dating world to those who want to follow her crazy love triangles and single girl antics :)
Check out, A Dating Confessional!!! I love this girl because she has interesting things to add to dating and this is a cute blog! Dating stories, adventures and cooking this has it all!
Also something to look at on a rainy day- from dating red flags to KISSING and even Single in America Fact v. Fiction this LifeBytes is cute and interesting to read and there are video links that are pretty funny :)

Enjoy these 3 new Blogs!!! xo